We talk a lot about success, don’t we? The shiny cars, the big houses, the Insta-perfect lives. But what if I told you the real secret sauce isn’t some magic mantra or a hidden formula from a motivational guru? What if it’s simpler, more fundamental? It’s confidence.
Yes, you heard that right. Confidence first, then success. Not the other way around. Think of it like this: your confident decisions are the seeds, and success is the harvest. The problem arises when someone accidentally stumbles upon a harvest without ever planting a seed.
You see it all the time. Someone gets a sudden, unexpected hit—maybe a viral reel, a lucky break in business, or a random lottery win (okay, maybe not that last one for most of us). And suddenly, they’re walking around like they own the world. Their chest is puffed out, their opinions are gospel, and they’re quick to dismiss anyone who questions them. This, my dear friends, isn’t confidence. This is arrogance.
Arrogance is like a house of cards built on borrowed glory. It’s born from past achievements, often ones that weren’t fully earned through deliberate action. There’s an underlying tremor of doubt, a secret fear that it might all disappear because, deep down, they don’t quite know how they got there. And when things go south, guess who gets the blame? Astrology, “bad vibes,” the neighbour’s evil eye, anything but their own lack of genuine conviction. They haven’t connected the dots between their decisions and their outcomes, so they outsource the credit and the blame.
Now, true confidence? Ah, that’s a different beast altogether. It’s that calm smile, that unshakeable knowing that comes from within. It’s not about shouting your achievements from the rooftops; it’s about quietly knowing you’ve got the next few moves figured out in your head.
Think about the truly successful people you admire. Do they constantly seek validation? Are they running around asking every Tom, Dick, and Hari for their opinion before making a move? Not usually. They might listen, sure, but there’s a crucial difference between taking opinions and seeking feedback.
Here’s the breakdown, because it’s subtle but mighty:
- Asking for an opinion before you do something: This often stems from a lack of confidence. You’re essentially asking for permission, hoping someone else will make the decision for you. It’s like asking your colony aunties if your bhindi sabzi recipe is good before you even start chopping the bhindi.
- Asking for feedback after you’ve done something: This is the hallmark of confidence. You’ve made your decision, you’ve acted, and now you’re simply fine-tuning. You’re open to insights, ready to course-correct, but the core decision is yours. It’s like serving the bhindi sabzi and then asking, “How’s the spice level? Too much jeera?” You’re confident in your cooking, but open to making it even better next time.
Successful people don’t shy away from feedback. They welcome it as data, as an opportunity to tweak, to refine, to make their already strong conviction even stronger. They know what they want, they’ve thought it through, and they’re simply double-checking for blind spots, not outsourcing their intuition.
Without that foundational confidence, any sudden success is like building a skyscraper on sand. It might stand for a bit, but one strong monsoon or an unexpected gust of wind, and poof! Down it goes.
So, next time you see someone radiating that quiet certainty, know this: it’s not about being born with it. It’s about building it, brick by brick, one confident decision at a time. And the best part? That inner knowing, that calm smile, that’s what truly paves the way for the success that sticks.
Because the real magic isn’t just about getting there, but about knowing you can stay there, come what may.
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